A hippie according to Starbucks.

Its been a while. Not since I’ve gone to Starbucks (obviously) but since I’ve written about it. Mainly it’s because our relationship has been a little strained ever since they decided to raise the prices behind my back by 9 cents. (The horror!)

It was a blatant betrayal of my trust and a total attack on my unwavering commitment to them (for the most part) as my sole provider for my morning coffee du jour.

Was it callous of them? Yes. Was insensitive? Obviously. Have I forgiven them even though I have trust issues and a self-realized tendency to like things/people who are bad for me? Of course.

We live in a society, as this article states, where "…you either define yourself as part of the Starbucks community or as someone ‘who doesn't do Starbucks.’" I think the answer is fairly clear about which side of the line I’m on, and I have to admit there something overwhelmingly snobbish and irritating about these people who are all "I don’t do Starbucks."

What does that even mean? Are you saying that if the only coffee you could ever get again for the rest of your life was indeed, Starbucks Breakfast Blend, you would give up coffee forever simply because you "don’t do" coffee from the corporate coffee king? I mean, that’s a little more ridiculous than $3 a cup, don’t you think?

And where does such anger come from? Why the hostility? I’m turning the tables on where the snobbery lies in the Starbucks equation and it isn’t the Starbucks-goer with the elitist attitude, it’s the Starbucks-nongoer, (under caffeinated), who chooses to go out of their way simply to criticize and belittle previously mentioned coffee drinker for their provider of choice.

I don’t go around telling them that I "don’t do" PBR, or that I "don’t do" you know…dread locks and skinny jeans. So, I mean, why all the hate? It’s not your money I’m spending on my grande soy latte on only odd-numbered days in only the two weeks immediately following the arrival of a paycheck. Is it?

I didn’t think so. And to anger them even more I’ll continue to do so despite the fact the Starbucks Oracle as defined me as (when entering soy latte as my drink of choice):

Personality type: Hippie

In addition to being a hippie, you are a hypochondriac health nut. You secretly think that your insistence on only consuming all-natural products is because you're so intelligent and well-informed; it's actually because you're a sucker. You've dabbled in Wicca or other pseudo-religions that attract morons and have changed your sexual orientation a few times this year. You probably live in California. Everyone who drinks grande soy latte should be forced to eat a McDonald's bacon cheeseburger.

Also drinks: Beverages with lots of marketing that says they're herbal and organic
Can also be found at: Whole Foods, indoor rock climbing facilities

Well, I’ve never been to California...but I definitely don’t do McDonald’s.