“Do you read Anne Rice?” he asked.
In the morning on the subway before coffee I hardly know my name let alone what the random person next to me is talking about.
“I’m sorry?”
“Anne Rice,” he said again and my brain clicked open just enough to remember that Ms. Rice is the author of several gothic and religious themed books. I looked at the cover of the book I was currently reading to make sure I hadn’t entirely lost my mind. But White Noise by Don DeLillo is no Vampire Chronicles.
“No, I’ve never read her,” I said. “Why?”
“The black nail polish,” he said gesturing toward my hands. “All of those Goth readers seem to always have black nail polish.”
“Oh,” I said and for the first time noticed how green his eyes were and how striking his smile was. “Yeah, no, I just like the color.”
“That’s cool,” he said and smiled again and I wondered if all of the quiet people packed into the train could see me trying not to blush. “It’s like those Twilight readers too, right? Although I’ve never read it and probably never will.”
“I haven’t either, I’m sort of against them.”
“Me too. They’re ridiculous.”
Could it be!? Someone who has the same opinions on literature as I do? Sitting here smiling at me on this horrible Monday morning in a place where no one ever talks to anyone? All these years on the subway and finally some cute, interesting guy is talking to me? I looked back to my book and forgot momentarily how to read. Was I supposed to say something else?
“This place is so much different than LA,” I heard him say. I looked back over to him, his arm brushing against mine and suddenly I felt that same feeling I’ve become so accustomed to when it comes to men – disappointment.
“Oh, you live in LA?” I asked.
“Yeah just got in this morning at 4AM and I’m reeling.”
Of course (rule #1 on my list: don't fall for people who live in another state).
“Have you never been here before?”
“Nope, first time and I’m a little overwhelmed.”
“It’s an easy place to navigate, you'll be fine. And we’re having great weather this week if you have a lot of walking around to do…”
Weather? I hated myself.
“I have family in the Bronx I’m sort of scared to visit. They’re one of those crazy Italian families that I know once I get up there they won’t let me leave.”
AND he's Italian.
“How long are you here for?”
“Just seven days. Are you a native New Yorker?”
“No, but I’ve been here a while.”
“So then you are. To me you are.”
People talk all the time about fate and destiny, but I think when it comes to finding love it really just comes down to sheer dumb luck. Chance. The ability to be at the right place at the right time. And when it comes to timing in love, I’ve found that I've got the worst luck of all.
“Well this is my stop,” he said. “It was really great meeting you. I hope I run into you again.”
Before I could say anything, he flashed that smile and was gone. And I think we both knew enough about hope and chance and timing and luck to know that was never going to happen.
August 31, 2009
August 25, 2009
@Times They Are a-Changin’
When it comes to living in a city like this there are things that you inevitably have to concede in order to continue living a fairly normal lifestyle. On top of how expensive everything is (thanks Starbucks for upping your prices. Even ten cents per grande bold is making an impact on my wallet) and after you’ve decided to spend more money on rent than you’d ever imagined, you recognize in your heat-induced coma (while clamoring for what little bit of cool air is coming from your window fan no larger than a basketball), that you just can’t have it all.
Shit.
So what concessions have I made? I joke to friends about having travelled back in time, but in all honesty I really have felt more removed from the outside world since I’ve had to give up what everyone lives on/talks about/thrives upon – cable, internet and the sanity that comes with air conditioning in ninety degree heat.
Admittedly the irony isn’t lost on me. Growing up I had parents who were strong believers in the difference between want and need and the importance of having their children realize said difference at an early age. No cable, no AC, no sugary cereal of any kind. I like to think it helped make me a better and more grounded adult, but in the case of Want v. Need it didn’t make me complain any less when I couldn’t join in the locker conversations about the latest episode of the Real World. Was no one watching Nova in junior high?
I’m pretty sure there aren’t many people living in New York City really thinking too much about need over want, either. This is after all the city that defines itself as a place that lets you have it all. How can I be expected to make such sacrifices in the city that never sleeps? (Note: I’ve come to find that the large population of the city not doing any sleeping are those of us sweating without window units).
Truth is I’m tired, hot and out of the conversational loop over after work drinks for not having been able to see the Mad Men premiere or the finale of Nurse Jackie. I’m looked at like an alien from another planet because I don’t know what albums are new on iTunes and have instead been listening to records (gasp!) from long ago bands. And I’m not posting things on Facebook or returning emails right away, either. Where have you been?! Friends ask. What have you been doing?
When did we become so attached to instantaneous responses? Call me, I say. It’s my only connection to the outside world. But no one calls anymore. People text and email and post messages on people’s walls about the intentions of calling, but in the end they never do. It all takes up too much time and energy because an actual conversation is like, so 2001. This is the age of technology, the age of the blackberry and emoticon and telling people how we feel in 160 words or less.
In the end I joined Twitter, one last ditch effort not to lose all of my friends entirely. Sure, I can’t really check it and don’t know what to post (after all, what new shows have I been watching? What news websites have I been able to check?), and I still don’t know what any of it really is supposed to mean. But it’s all about trying to roll with the changing of the times, even if you don’t really understand or like where they’re taking you.
At least that’s what some guy on one of my records sings about.
Right now, I just want fall to be here.
And if you have any questions, you know how to reach me.
Shit.
So what concessions have I made? I joke to friends about having travelled back in time, but in all honesty I really have felt more removed from the outside world since I’ve had to give up what everyone lives on/talks about/thrives upon – cable, internet and the sanity that comes with air conditioning in ninety degree heat.
Admittedly the irony isn’t lost on me. Growing up I had parents who were strong believers in the difference between want and need and the importance of having their children realize said difference at an early age. No cable, no AC, no sugary cereal of any kind. I like to think it helped make me a better and more grounded adult, but in the case of Want v. Need it didn’t make me complain any less when I couldn’t join in the locker conversations about the latest episode of the Real World. Was no one watching Nova in junior high?
I’m pretty sure there aren’t many people living in New York City really thinking too much about need over want, either. This is after all the city that defines itself as a place that lets you have it all. How can I be expected to make such sacrifices in the city that never sleeps? (Note: I’ve come to find that the large population of the city not doing any sleeping are those of us sweating without window units).
Truth is I’m tired, hot and out of the conversational loop over after work drinks for not having been able to see the Mad Men premiere or the finale of Nurse Jackie. I’m looked at like an alien from another planet because I don’t know what albums are new on iTunes and have instead been listening to records (gasp!) from long ago bands. And I’m not posting things on Facebook or returning emails right away, either. Where have you been?! Friends ask. What have you been doing?
When did we become so attached to instantaneous responses? Call me, I say. It’s my only connection to the outside world. But no one calls anymore. People text and email and post messages on people’s walls about the intentions of calling, but in the end they never do. It all takes up too much time and energy because an actual conversation is like, so 2001. This is the age of technology, the age of the blackberry and emoticon and telling people how we feel in 160 words or less.
In the end I joined Twitter, one last ditch effort not to lose all of my friends entirely. Sure, I can’t really check it and don’t know what to post (after all, what new shows have I been watching? What news websites have I been able to check?), and I still don’t know what any of it really is supposed to mean. But it’s all about trying to roll with the changing of the times, even if you don’t really understand or like where they’re taking you.
At least that’s what some guy on one of my records sings about.
Right now, I just want fall to be here.
And if you have any questions, you know how to reach me.
August 6, 2009
Your Daily Forecast:
Rain in New York has become almost as common as the tourists who insist on stopping at the top of the subway steps to look at their maps. While I hate talking about the weather (and people who insist on talking about the weather), I guess it really is the one thing we all have in common (aside from frustration in our jobs, frequent bouts of depression and flat-lining relationships) that we’re okay to talk about with complete and total strangers.
I can’t begin to count the amount of people who have told me things about the weather, everywhere from standing sweating next to them on the subway platform, waiting in line behind them at Duane Reade, sitting beside them at Film Forum. We all can’t seem to stop ourselves from talking about this damn heat/humidity/rain/sun-that-turns-to-hurricane-and-back-to-sun-in-under-thirty-minutes. Did you see that tornado in Jersey? No. Did your power go out? No. Oh, well mine did. Did you see that the UV index is at a whopping nine!? Umm…
What are they doing? Watching the weather channel twenty-four hours a day? Is it on in the background when they’re cooking dinner and in the bathroom or making love? Just move to the left a little honey, I want to see what the average high is going to be for tomorrow…
I think that maybe we’re all so isolated during the winter months (that are right around the corner!) that we’ll do anything to reach out and talk to someone when we’ve all got our windows open and our flip-flops on and frizzy hair that no one cares about.
Personally I never really participate and find myself more just nodding or say things like “I know,” or “Yeah, it’s really bad,” before trying to move away from them without it looking obvious. Because truth be told I guess I’m that kind of New Yorker who doesn’t mind much not being bothered by anyone during the cold or warmer months of the year.
With a few weeks of summer left however, I guess maybe I’ll try to take part in this meteorological frenzy. New York is after all about the people you meet, a thing that’s becoming increasingly more difficult in this world where we carry through with most all of our interactions with other people via a screen or a profile or in amessage of 140 words or less.
So here goes nothing.
Tomorrow will be a high of 83 degrees (feels like 78), wind Northwest at 11 miles-per-hour with an overnight low of 64. Humidity 59 percent.
Would you look at that. No rain.
I can’t begin to count the amount of people who have told me things about the weather, everywhere from standing sweating next to them on the subway platform, waiting in line behind them at Duane Reade, sitting beside them at Film Forum. We all can’t seem to stop ourselves from talking about this damn heat/humidity/rain/sun-that-turns-to-hurricane-and-back-to-sun-in-under-thirty-minutes. Did you see that tornado in Jersey? No. Did your power go out? No. Oh, well mine did. Did you see that the UV index is at a whopping nine!? Umm…
What are they doing? Watching the weather channel twenty-four hours a day? Is it on in the background when they’re cooking dinner and in the bathroom or making love? Just move to the left a little honey, I want to see what the average high is going to be for tomorrow…
I think that maybe we’re all so isolated during the winter months (that are right around the corner!) that we’ll do anything to reach out and talk to someone when we’ve all got our windows open and our flip-flops on and frizzy hair that no one cares about.
Personally I never really participate and find myself more just nodding or say things like “I know,” or “Yeah, it’s really bad,” before trying to move away from them without it looking obvious. Because truth be told I guess I’m that kind of New Yorker who doesn’t mind much not being bothered by anyone during the cold or warmer months of the year.
With a few weeks of summer left however, I guess maybe I’ll try to take part in this meteorological frenzy. New York is after all about the people you meet, a thing that’s becoming increasingly more difficult in this world where we carry through with most all of our interactions with other people via a screen or a profile or in amessage of 140 words or less.
So here goes nothing.
Tomorrow will be a high of 83 degrees (feels like 78), wind Northwest at 11 miles-per-hour with an overnight low of 64. Humidity 59 percent.
Would you look at that. No rain.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)