Do you take the non-believers?

It had been cold and raining all morning and walking down Lexington the rain fell on my shoulders and over the tops of my shoes and washed away all of the things from the year past that I couldn’t change. It all, (most of it), fell away and was soaked up by the sidewalks and pavement of the city with everyone else’s dashed hopes and dreams never realized, taking root under its tall buildings, its people-filled streets, tucked away and kept there safely until one day, (soon, we hope) they can come true.

You just have to believe, I guess, that if you keep going about the daily chores of your life with your dreams underfoot, (and if you’re in exact right place at the exact right time), it can all (most of it) work out eventually.

But I wonder if we all lost the maps of our lives if we’d still find our way to the place we’re supposed to be. If suddenly all of the streets started to run North to South and the avenues East to West, would we still know in our hearts our true bearings? Would we still be able to find our way home? Or perhaps you just have to believe that fate and life will inevitably take you to the place you’re supposed to end up - no matter how much the topography happens to shift.

The grid pattern of this city is straightforward enough for anyone to follow, but there are still times that you can’t help but get lost (where exactly is Little West 10th?). Busses and subways and taxis are all always moving us from one place to another - but time and change and obligations can stand in the way of an express-stop to experiencing all of the possibilities of where life could take you.

But this city takes the non-believers, which is a good thing because I’m one of them. I’m a non-believer who will never know every corner of this city and will never know what’s supposed to be. Supposed. Supposed. Supposed. I just keep taking busses and subways and taxis and wait to see if after the rain storm the sun comes out. And after I walked through Central Park, through the throngs of photo-taking tourists, determined resolution joggers, and the thick smell of cart-sold chestnuts, I saw it as it reflected warm orange light off the windows of the high-rise apartment buildings along 5th avenue - exactly where it should be, making it easy for me to find my way back.